Here's the what I have in full. Other than spelling and grammar, (which I'll fix later), what suggestions would you make to change/add tweak.
The Mystery of Chelyabinsk
Chelyabinsk, a planet on the fringe or periphery that during the chaos of the Succession Wars that suddenly lost contact with the HPG Net. Isolated from the rest of the Inner Sphere and the Periphery this Lost Daughter of Terra is all but forgotten. Soon after the HPG Station went off line the local COMSTAR’s COM GUARD unit sent an expedition to the planet. The last contact with the unit was they had arrived in orbit and were making planet fall. They were never heard from again.
The Politics of the Succession Wars and COMSTAR itself soon made the loss of communication with this planet was de-prioritized. Eventually it was mostly forgotten. What little that COMSTAR remembered about Chelyabinsk was a Battlemech Producing Planet. It was one of the few they encountered that was still functioning at the time of the blackout. As pseudo-peace or even just a lull in the Succession Wars settles over the Inner Sphere, COMSTAR’s EXPLORER CORPS and the COM GUARD want to find out what happened on Chelyabinsk.
A fairly temperate planet with two continents, most of the surface covered with Oceans. The water between the two continents is known as The Jade Expanse. The northern ocean is called The Sterile Sea. The southern ocean is called The Tideless Waves. The finally ocean is called The Peaceful Depths. The western continent is called Nialand. The eastern one is called Brezoth.
According to COMSTAR most of the population was located on Nialand. Nialand has two large mountain ranges. The eastern range is known as the Macawe Highlands, which has a large coastal plain that reaches out to The Jade Expanse. The western range is known as Lamset Mountain, which has a smaller coastal plain that reaches into The Peaceful Depths. Between the two mountain ranges is the Disriden Plains, vast expansive grassland. There are four major settlements on Nialand. In the north is Krapolis, the planetary capital, which also has the largest of the two spaceports, and also the location of the COMSTAR HPG Station. To the west on the shores of The Peaceful Depths, is Tromond, was largely a vacation location. The eastern settlement on the shore of The Jade Expanse, this was an industrial center, known as Brusgend. The southern settlement is also an industrial center, and known as Klathe. On the Disriden Plains connected to the four industrial centers by the railway network are various component manufactures that make the armament, ammunition, electronics, engines, and armor, amongst other things.
There was some population on Brezoth but it was largely filled with the vast area called The Silent Wilds. Most of Brezoth was used trials of the battlemechs produced on the planet. The western shores of Brezoth which touches The Jade Expanse, has the only major population center of continent. It has a small spaceport which was mainly used for transporting machines from Nialand to the proving grounds on Brezoth. The name of this settlement is called Akata. Between the Jade Expanse and the Silent Wilds is a gently sloping coastal plan that leads up to Troval Highlands, which lead to the Plaibiens Mountains. The coastal plan and foothills have lush old growth forest, which grows up the Troval Highlands, which created a local timber industry. They use locally produced Industrial Mechs. A lot of metal is brought out of the Plaibien Mountains to feed the industrial machine on Nialand.
Chelyabinsk had eight lines of production on the western continent of Nialand; finally assembly was largely focused on in three of the four settlements of Nialand. Scattered throughout Nialand are sub-component factories, and ammunition planets, they were all connected by the vast railway network that brings components to the final assembly plant.
Krapolis: Finally, assembly of Firestarter FS9-A is done in one factory near the planetary capital.
Tromond: Finally, assembly of Wasp WSP-1A is done in a small factory nearby.
Brusgend: Finally, assembly of Rampage RMP-2G, Shadow Hawk SHD-2H, and Warhammer WHM-6R is done. Also produced in this factory is Lumberjack, Miningmech, Buster, and Crosscut models of Industrial mechs.
Klathe: Finally, assembly of Falcon FLC-4N, Phoenix PX-3R, and Stinger STG-2R is done.
There was a portion of a Battlemech Regiment from the local Nation State. COMSTAR tracked them as the garrison and some rebuilding units. They quickly disintegrated and many left the planet to become mercenaries or pirates.
Theory for the Blackout
Several theories exist for the blackout of Chelybinsk. They range from equipment failure, to planetary conditions, pirate raids, to planet wide plague. Since the loss of the relief operation, and the cancellation of the second relief operation, no one knows for sure.
The Relief Operation
With the loss of signal from the Chelybinsk Station the local Precentor wanted to see what was going on. He loaded up a simple Level II onto a dropship and sent them to find out what was going on. This mission included in the cargo of replacement parts and tech crews.
Upon arrival in the star system the dropship detached and transitioned into orbit around Chelybinsk. They initially sent down a signal to the Station and received no response. Sending a signal back to the jumpship that there was no contact with the station, they were in orbit and were planning to make planet fall.
That was the last message heard from the dropship. The jumpship waited until they had to leave. Upon returning to their starting point, the jumpship was planning to resupply and return to Chelybinsk. Before they could jump out, they were ordered to another location, and never embarked another dropship to return to Chelybinsk.
This would lead to the mystery of Chelybinsk.
As the lull in the fighting of the Succession Wars gave COMSTAR some free time the First Circuit decided to revisit the Blackout of Chelyabinsk. They decided two put a task force with members of EXPLORER CORPS and the COM GUARDS. After assembling what research, they had on Chelybinsk, they decided to send the brand new Magellan Class Jumpship, ECV Erebus, under the command of Precentor Persephone Alberdingk, as well as a single dropship Union Class Dropship CSV Warbride, under command of Precentor Gustaf Ready, would be carried and COM GUARS would supply a single Level II, under command of Adept Richard Hadjiev. This operation is called Operation Homesick.